Do you hear what I hear?

My husband and I were talking on the phone as I was getting ready to take Molly to preschool this morning. I was giving him a recap of a little event that happened last week. It was such a small thing, but I kept thinking that it's such a perfect example of how women think and respond vs. how men think and respond.

Here is the scenario:

I walk Molly into school and find the director talking to Molly's teacher. She is telling her (rather firmly, I might add) that she only has 2 immunization records from the whole class, and that they absolutely have to collect those ASAP. I actually had mine at home, because I had read the Parent handbook (as only a good former 1st grade teacher would do!) and noted that the immunization records were required. The part that I wasn't sure about was when they wanted them, because the parent handbook said they were due Sept. 2008, and this class started Jan. 2009. Did they want them right away? Did they want them with registration for fall preschool? I did not know. No one ever mentioned it, so I just held on to mine. I'll call the director "R".

R-(to Molly's teacher) I only have 2 immunization records from your class. They need to get those to me right away!

Me- Oh, hey R! I guess I'm one of the parents that needs to turn mine in. I have it, but I was a little unsure of when you wanted it.

R- (forced half smile) It was in the Parent Handbook.

Here is where I have to stop, because here is what a man hears and what a woman hears is entirely different!

What a man hears: "It was in the Parent Handbook"

What a woman hears: "It was in the Parent handbook....you know, the one that you obviously and ignorantly tossed aside because you are one of THOSE parents! You are obviously a complete moron and unfit to be a mother."

Are you on my page here? I spent the next 4 hours thinking of what I would say when I handed her my immunization form. I also relayed the whole story to 2 friends, just to have some back up! I realize this sounds completely pathetic, and I wouldn't even share such a sad story if I weren't sure that all the ladies out there will know exactly what I'm talking about!

So 4 hours later, I went back, records in hand, to pick up Molly. As fate would have it, the director came down the hall just as I walked in the door. I handed her my form and got a sincere smile and "thank you"! I figured, "Ok! All is well. I'll just explain myself a little bit..." It went something like this:

Me- "Hey R! I'm sorry I didn't turn this in earlier. I actually did read the handbook, which is why I had a copy, but it said to have it turned in last Sept., and since we weren't here then I wasn't sure......"

I stopped there because at this point she has a cold look on her face and I promise she is literally looking straight through me!

What a man thinks: "I'm done here. Cool."

What a woman thinks:" Oh my gosh!!! She thinks I am such an idiot! She thinks I am lying about reading the handbook! I was a teacher for crying out loud! Of COURSE I read it! She thinks I am so monumentally stupid that she can't even look at me!"

I am laughing out loud right now at how RIDICULOUS this all is, but don't you have stories like this of your own? While you think about it, I'm going to re-read the Parent Handbook...